My Life, My Way!

I just want to tell you how much you mean to me. But it seems so pathetic coming from my mouth.

Wednesday was a fine day but i had to get to work to start at 10pm for my overnight shift. I got to admit that we got hammered…. But in saying that i had all my overnight duties done by 5 and i finished at 6. So that was good…

Then after my shift, my friend, Renae and myself decided to go and sit in her car and have breakfast after work — it then got to about  730 in the morning we were like we need to go get sleep… because we got overnight again tonight so she dropped me home.

As soon as i walked inside of the house i went to my room stared at my bed and i realized that i couldn’t sleep so i helped my sister get my two nephews ready for school and shit..

After about 45mins actually being at home, i left home without having any sleep knowing that i got a 10 hour overnight (in reality, i didn’t do) shift. 

After just chilling with my sister, i went and picked up my girlfriend from school. We then decided to go for a little stroll around Newtown and went had some sort of lunch type deal. 

I was noticing that she would glance at me smile and turn her head away and just have a straight long face. like i knew something was up and i wanted to find out to put her at ease. So i kept nagging and nagging. 

Then it hit me when we were on the escalators heading down to Platform 12 at Redfern to go to her house. I was standing on one step lower than her so that i could look straight at her so that i didn’t have look down at her… i went to go give her a kiss and then she turned her head away from me when i kissed her. From that I knew what she wanted to say was not good… She started to become distant with me over the trip back to hers.  

She Broke up with me. i was devastated… i knew it was coming but not like straight away, you know? — but that wasn’t half of what has made me so upset, it was half the reason why she told me after she broke up with me…

The day before that she broke up with me, she did the one thing that a partner should never do if in a relationship, she cheated on me… with some guy from chatswood….

she told me this just before i had to leave to catch a train to work. for the 10 hour shift. i had a million-and-one things running through my mind, like, How could i not see this coming…. 

I was crying all night because being the first relationship in 8 months???!!!!

And Now she still wants to be close friends and i have no idea what to say cause i was truly myself when i was with her… like completely honest and shit… and it had to end this way… 

What should i Do? Fellow followers?